(Photo taken from above Orange County as we were about to land in Santa Ana last night (not the best quality but look at that sunset and all of the city lights!). Thoughts written from yesterday’s plane ride, post actually made from cute little coffees shop marketplace thing today.) *If this post is formatted funny, I apologize in advance…sometimes these come out weird when I post from my iPad.
Last week was my last week working with The Covering House, an amazing non-profit organization in St. Louis. If you haven’t heard of The Covering House, visit their website HERE to learn more about their mission and what they are doing in St. Louis. It has been an incredible year (or just about) with this organization and group of people. The job itself has humbled me in so many ways, taught me so many things and introduced me to some truly incredible people that I otherwise would never have met. This role was such a great transition for me for so many reasons, both personally and profssionally. My last event for TCH was on Thursday evening, and although my heart felt sad to leave, I am really ready to fully focus on what the west coast will have in store. Did you miss our moving (yet again, but BIG move this time around) announcement? You can read more about it in my last post.
As I sit here on this airplane leaving home to travel to our soon-to-be new home, so many thoughts are racing through my head, as they have been for the last few months as we’ve been working through the details of making such a big life change. And boy are there ever so many details. I’m going to miss so many things about home (as in home home, St. Louis home), but gosh this is just going to be such an incredible opportunity for us in so many ways. We’ve got big goals this next week as I fly out to meet Tim in Orange County, CA. We need to find a place to live. I’ve got job interviews lined up (prayers and good vibes are so greatly appreciated). You know. Just the minor details that moving across the country entails.
I think that this whole thing is a really good challenge for me. If you know me, you probably know two things about me. I’m a perfectionist. And I’m a planner. (A blessing and a curse I tell you.) But at the same time, I crave adventure, and although terrifying, I do actually like to take risks every once in awhile and just see what happens. I say all this as I continue to mentally plan our entire next year, next five years, next ten years. Will we still be living on the west coast? Will our family finally start to grow (as in with humans)? How old will our dogs be? Will they love our future children? Where will we be working? Whoa whoa whoa. Seriously people. This is how my brain works. This can truly make someone crazy. I want so badly to take things one day at a time. I will say that right now, I have never been so unplanned in my entire life, so unknowing as to what our future holds (no home to live in in CA yet, no official moving date on the calendar (we’re looking at shortly after Christmas or the New Year as of now for those who have been asking…hoping to know for sure real soon!), and I’m currently unemployed at the moment, if you will (gasp, that sounds SO weird!). But, somehow, deep down (like really deep down here), I also feel ok. I’m freaked out, yes. But I also feel ok. Something in the back of my mind (well, basically God here) is telling me that everything’s going to be OK, and things will soon fall our way. Slowly but surely, but they will. And slowly but surely, they have been. Maybe not quite as ‘planned,’ but you get my point.
One thing that life has really taught me, especially recently, is that no matter how much we plan, there are likely other plans out there waiting for us. Just a few weeks ago, I heard this quote…I can’t remember where I heard it, but it goes like this:
“You just give up the life that is planned to get the life that has been waiting for you,” Joseph Campbell
Boom. In my face. I needed to hear that. So badly. (It’s killing me that I cannot remember where I actually heard this though…was in in church? Did I read it in one of the ten different books I’ve started in the last several months that I’ve yet to find the time to finish? Huh.) I’ve been getting small signs such as that coming my way.
So, I can sit here and plan all I want. Every single step along the way. And of course I do still think that plans and goals are good. So so good. But, I also think it’s important to go where life leads us sometimes too. Will the timing always be right? Probably not. We’ve owned our house in St. Louis for a year, and our first nephew is on his way into the world in a few short months (yay! I’m already so excited to go back home and meet that tiny new human in the spring!). But can we always let things stop us? The unknown? The what ifs? I really don’t think so. (Coming from the girl who is having an internal anxiety attack thinking about what the future may or may not hold right this very moment.) I’ve always admired the people who have the courage to make such big and exciting new changes, and I always thought at some point I too could, would, be that person, yet it always felt so far away, and I never quite knew In what capacity something like that may actually look like. And here we are.
Life is a beautiful and bold adventure. I’d be lying if I sat here and told you I’m not going to plan a dang thing anymore because, let’s just be honest here, but I am going to continue to challenge myself to take each day one day at a time and to live life for what it’s worth. I can’t wait to see what the west coast has in store for us. But in the meantime, feel free to send good vibes our way 😉
side note – I am finding that dogs can seemingly go just about everywhere around here. Bentley and Emma will love it!
another side note – again, sorry if formatting of this post is weird (it’s driving me crazy); sometimes I think that WordPress has a mind of its own…will fix when I am no longer on a mobile device.